What’s Holding You Back? Fear Number One

What’s Holding You Back? Could it be Your Fear? 

Fear Number One…

So, you have a dream, a goal that you’ve mulled over and you’ve decided to go for it. A few weeks have go by. What have you done about it? If it’s “Not a lot so far,” let’s find out why.

Maybe you have doubts or concerns. Maybe you are a bit worried or anxious about taking the first, or the next steps to achieve your goals. Are you procrastinating or hesitating just not taking action to get what you dream for?

You know, more often than not it’s due to one thing – FEAR. There is a thought, feeling, belief, or possible outcome that makes you uncomfortable and you avoid thinking about it and therefore you don’t take action.

Your fears, can control your life and prevent you from reaching your full potential. Your fears can stop you from creating a better life for you and your family.


Rational fears that help keep you safe from harm such as fear of poisonous snakes or bushfires or violent situations are not the fears I mean here. The Fears I mean are those inside your head, the ones preventing you from creating the life you want to live.

Before discussing the Fears that are holding you back, let’s make sure that what you want, that dream, your goal, (or even your B.H.A.G. – Big Hairy Audacious Goal) is what you REALLY want for YOURSELF. If you want something because of someone else then maybe you’re not taking action because you don’t REALLY want it at all.

What do you want? Do you want it because your manager wants it? Or your parents? Or your partner? Or your peers? Or your children? Or do you want it because it’s what ‘everyone is supposed to want for themselves?’

What do YOU want for yourself? You are, after all, the most important person in your life. If you don’t take care of yourself you won’t be able to take care of anyone else the best way you could. As they say when you’re on a plane and they are conducting the safety demonstrations, put on YOUR oxygen mask first before helping others.

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If you have now decided that your dream, your goal is for YOU, let’s discuss what might be holding you back from achieving it.

Here’s Fear Number One:

The Fear of Failure

This may seem obvious to you because it’s so common however it certainly will keep you from reaching your goals. The Fear of Failing will prevent you from taking Action. You won’t speak with your boss about that overdue raise or you won’t apply for that new job that sounds so perfect for you or offer to take on additional responsibility because you might fail. You tell yourself that it’s not a good time right now or when ‘something’ happens then it will be the right time.

There is no such thing as failure – only feedback

If things don’t go the way you hope the first time, are you going to give up? No! Learn from it, reassess the situation, what could you have done better? What could you have done differently to achieve a different outcome?

If things don’t go the way you hope the first time what would be the worst-case scenario? If that happens, decide how you will handle it. Once you have a plan for the worst possible thing that can happen, go for it! You are prepared. If you are well prepared, you will learn and when it is time, you will succeed.

Let’s end this post with a wonderful quote:

One must be a god to be able to tell successes from failures without making a mistake. ~Anton Pavlovich Chekhov

What are your thoughts? Leave a comment below and let us know what works for you to overcome the Fear of Failure?

2 Comments

  • Jane,
    Great article. No fear should hold us back in living our lives as we want and going after our biggest dreams.
    And I fully agree : there is no such thing as failure – only feedback to grow.

    I would even add to it :
    – seek feedback on a regular basis
    – have an open mind
    – be positive and collaborative towards a solution to grow from it.

    Reply
    • Yes Ingrid – thank you for your comments – and positivity towards collaboration with others and forming solid partnerships for success is essential to help boost our confidence too.

      Reply

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